The Sunshine Empire

As we sit here at the end of the American Empire, looking for who’s at fault for the decline of our great republic, the political and media elites seem to be looking in all the wrong places. Those insidious souls that are ruining this once mighty nation are not the political types you would think at fault.

Some have organized against what they feel is the true threat hanging over America, spending Democrats. The people who seem to have so much time off to protest the impending socialism overtaking us, tell anyone who will listen that they are concerned about our deficit spending. They say we are mortgaging our children’s future with unfunded mandates. I’ll be the first to say that I find spending the most unsettling thing about our government, but forgive me if I doubt this come-to-Jesus moment on spending from Republicans. Most Earl Gray ingrates ignore the fact that they were silent as Reagan, Bush, and Bush created more than a supermajority of the national debt we now owe to the Chinese. The same former Vice President that the CPAC conference cheered this past month famously told former Treasury Secretary Paul O’Neil, “. . Reagan proved deficits don’t matter.” The manufactured astroturf outrage of the Tea Parties and the new found love of fiscal discipline on the part of Republicans is put forth to blame Democrats for something they had little to do with, but this is not what threatens us as a people.

The real threat to us all are those who will begin watching the Tonight Show again because Jay Leno is the host again. These unimaginative, unoriginal mindless drags on our progress as a society will be the first ones to sign our freedoms away to a coming Leno coup. Letterman fans like myself will be rounded up into re-education camps, Howard Stern will be taken off of the air, and a tear will well up on Lady Liberty’s face. Die in a tire fire Leno fans.